Trying to make it through life with His help.

Posts tagged ‘Layoff’

Tomorrow is the first day of my new life.

On Friday, September the 13th, I was laid off from work. This didn’t come as a complete surprise to me. I mean, there’s only so long you can have nothing to do at work and still expect to have a job, right? I helped other departments with filing and was doing some data entry for a new program being implemented. But, they could find anyone to do that. I just wasn’t needed any more. After 14 years, that’s what it came down to. My team of three was over-staffed by one. And this time, it was me.

Now, you may think I would be pretty upset about this. But, in fact, I’m not. Sure, I’ll miss all the friends I had made there, but that’s not enough to keep you in a place in which you had pretty much become miserable. Most of the people were great. I don’t think there was even one person I didn’t like to be around. (Which wasn’t the case a few years ago!)

You may be asking yourself, “Why, especially in this economy, aren’t you upset about losing your job?” And my answer would be, because I have faith in God. And I know that He has a plan for me (Jeremiah 29:11). One that I have no way of grasping yet, and something that only He can make happen.

The last few years at work have been an emotional roller coaster. Being in the industry we were in, there were several layoffs. So, for over five years, we’ve all been waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop, wondering if we were next. We used to dread “Black Thursdays” as they became known, because that was the day they would let people go.

I had survived the layoffs and I have to believe it was for a reason. One I may never know, but He does. His timing is perfect. Often, the daily survival wasn’t easy, either. My boss drove me crazy at times, as many can do. I frequently felt like I was being picked on. (Which, as an adult, is just as frustrating, if not more so, as it was when you were a kid.) It seemed no matter what I did, it was wrong. I would just get into the groove of doing something and liking it and it would be yanked away from me, and I’d be doing something completely different. But, I have to say, that each time this happened, turns out, it was for the best. (God was obviously watching out for me, keeping me there for His reasons, not mine). Also, I’m not one to suffer change quietly…lol  So, if I was unhappy about the change, you pretty well knew it. I might stew about it for a few hours, but I always came around and went with the change.

Right after Labor Day, I had a major attitude adjustment. I knew it was going to be a particularly hard day. So, before going inside the building, I sat in my car for a few minutes listening to The FISH, (a contemporary christian radio station), and said a prayer. I gave the day over to the Lord completely. I knew this was the only way this day could be a good one. My attitude had gotten pretty bad, which isn’t like me. 98% of the time, I’m a very happy, upbeat and positive person. But the last month or so had thrown me for a loop. Change was coming, I just didn’t know how or when exactly.

That day was the first of many great days to come. Actually, it lasted until I was laid off.

When my boss came to me on Friday and said, “I need to talk to you.”, I wasn’t worried. As we started walking down the hall together, I figured out what was about to happen and I thought, “Oh, they’re going to let me go!” (I think I actually smiled!) As unusual as it sounds, I wasn’t scared. I wasn’t anxious. I wasn’t angry. I wasn’t even mildly ticked off! And best of all, I didn’t get that sick feeling I think most of us get when something like this happens. I was totally and completely at peace. God had prepared me for it. He had told me to be prepared to leave, and apparently, I was.

Before letting me go, they offered me the chance of another position. This position was in telesales, {sigh}, which just isn’t my forte, at all. Appreciating the effort of trying to keep me employed, I talked to the manager of the department. Honestly, I probably could have told him what he wanted to hear and gotten the position. But I’d have been miserable. And, through out the ‘interview’, I couldn’t shake the “I need to get out of here” feeling, either. God was making it uncomfortable for me to be there any longer than necessary.

So, it took me a while, but I said my goodbyes and left the only company I’d been with since moving to the Atlanta area. Don’t get me wrong, there were tears. And unless you’re someone who has a lot more emotional control than I do, there’s going to be a few tears when saying goodbye to the people you’ve shared 40 hours a week of your life with over the last 14 years. It’s a bit sad that you won’t get to see them as often, or for some, ever again.

There was such a sense of relief, too. I’m hoping my stress level will go down. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been completely relaxed. I think I even sleep tensed-up.

So, to quote a familiar axiom, Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life. I am really looking forward to, and excited about seeing, what the Lord has in store for me. I think from this day forward I will be walking in my destiny. And by keeping my eyes on Him, I will stay on the path He has chosen for me.


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